Dying to Love You
by Spunky0ne
Summary: As Byakuya lies, dying, in the rubble from the quincy war, he makes a final, desperate wish that he had done something differently. He never could imagine the evil one who was listening or the risk he would take for a second chance to win Ichigo's love...yaoi, not mpreg
1. Night

**Dying to Love You**

**By Spunky0ne**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

**(As Byakuya lies, dying, in the rubble from the quincy war, he makes a final, desperate wish that he had done something differently. He never could imagine the evil one who was listening or the risk he would take for a second chance to win Ichigo's love...LOL, it's Eumenida's fault for nudging me for Ichi/Bya/Ichi updates. I had two ideas haunting me and I have absolutely no restraint. Result...two new stories! This story is yaoi, but not mpreg.)**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

**Chapter 1: Night**

Byakuya wasn't sure how long he had been hearing the sound of the driving wind and pounding rain falling somewhere near where his ruined body laid, but he was surprised to still feel the chill when rainwater began to pool beneath his bloodied, fallen form. His backbone shattered from the final, wicked impact with his now deceased quincy opponent, he could barely turn his head to gather a bit of the water in his mouth to wash away the coppery taste.

_I wonder if drowning wouldn't be less painful and terrifying as lying here and expiring slowly, with enemies still wandering in the area. Yes, Ichigo has slain their king, but his minions, knowing their end is inevitable, are hunting and slaying whoever they can. I cannot move, and so would be finished as soon as I was found by them._

He shivered at the thought, but tried to put it out of his head to instead think of how things would be in the wake of the war.

_It will be spring soon. New flowers, grass and trees will grow. They will cover the scorched areas and make the air sweet with their fragrance. The smell of the wood being cut for new buildings will fill the air as well. There will be sounds all around of people remaking what was lost. While it is true that many, like me, who have fallen, will never enjoy those things again, Rukia, Renji, Tetsuya and Ichigo will all be in the midst of that renewal._

_That is a comfort._

His mind began to spin ominously as his blood slowly drained and he had no choice but to watch as it leaked slowly away. His eyes blinked and began to glaze over, and he was grateful that the pain seemed to fade with his awareness. He wasn't sure after a while if he was awake or asleep, if he was alive and dreaming, or if he was in the midst of dying already. But as he felt his coherence drift, he encountered a handsome face and warm smile, a comforting voice to listen to as he died. He drifted off to the sound of that voice, unsure if he would ever wake again.

"Ichigo," he murmured as he drifted into the darkness.

But even in the darkness, he couldn't escape what had begun to invade his thoughts. His cold and indifferent behavior towards the now revealed Shiba heir had long ago set the path for them.

_"You're slow," he said mockingly, "even when you fall."_

_"Go back to the world of the living, Kurosaki Ichigo, there is nothing for you to do here."_

_"A taichou of the Gotei 13 does not need help from the likes of you. What is your mission? You know the answer. Your mission is to protect that town. Go now, we will handle things here."_

While it was true that he had begun to alter his words and the way he looked at Ichigo, the young man had no reason or apparently any ability to realize that the Kuchiki ice prince had begun to fall for him.

_It happened slowly over time, so slowly that I didn't see it myself. I am a bit older, so I should have been wiser. When I realized what was happening, I shouldn't have tried to push it away. I should have told him. I know he understood that there was a fondness between us as time went on, but Ichigo never looked at me with the eyes of a lover, and I was too proud to lower myself and tell him how I felt. To have been rejected by him would have been humiliating._

_But dying without him knowing a thing is many times more painful._

_Ichigo will mourn me as a friend. Yes, that will make it easier for him, I suppose...to think of me with a twinge of sadness, but then to swiftly forget. Why is that so very painful? The thought that he won't remember me and I will fade from his mind._

_I was so wrong to let this happen..._

_I am sorry, Ichigo._

Byakuya felt the touch of a malevolent presence and tried to open his eyes. He felt an inward shiver as he realized he was no longer capable of moving at all. Slow footsteps brought the enemy closer, and Byakuya felt his body being turned over and studied through wicked, glaring eyes.

"Kuchiki Byakuya," said a low, oddly hypnotic voice, "what a state you are in. Don't try to get up."

He heard a soft, mocking laugh.

"Well now, what to do with you?" the quincy went on, "I suppose I should introduce myself."

"D-do you plan to k-kill me with your w-weapon, or are you going t-to bore me to death with words?" Byakuya managed to spit weakly.

Long fingers threaded into his silken hair and yanked his head back roughly.

"You sh-should know I'm beyond pain and cannot feel your t-torment," he added shakily.

"You think so?" the quincy asked saucily, "Think again. I know that your physical body can't feel the pain right now, but having had a moment in physical contact with you, I know how to hurt you badly."

"Are you referring to m-my sister?" Byakuya asked, "Sh-she will k-kill a weakling like you!"

"No," the quincy said, frowning, "But first things first. I am not one of the lettered quincies, but I do have my own power. My name is Amsel Adelmo. My name means 'Noble Protector,' and I take that meaning very seriously."

"Is that s-so?"

"My surname means 'blackbird.' It is a reminder that part of protecting the noble class is to rid it of imperfect creatures."

"And you consider me imperfect?"

"Well, you are a shinigami," the quincy chuckled, "But that alone does not necessarily make me want to kill you. If you were not noble, I would have killed you already, but given that you are, I will give you a chance."

"I am already dying," Byakuya answered softly, "You mean that you are able to stop that?"

He could feel the man's wicked smile, even without seeing.

"Not only can I stop you from dying, I can give you something you want very, very much."

"And what would that be?" Byakuya asked, "You have only known me for a few minutes at most. How could you know...?"

"I know because that is my power," Adelmo said sternly, "My power allows me, upon making physical contact with a target, to know that target's heart. I see everything in you, Kuchiki Byakuya...everything from your mother's death when you were born, to losing your father, then your wife, and to finding that new love that you so longed to pursue, but never took the chance. And having that power, even here, at the end of your life, I can offer you a second chance to fix the thing you most regret, the thing that tortures your mind as you lay there."

"And you would do this because?"

"I want to live," the quincy stated firmly, "and you want to fix things. We can both get what we want. Just make an agreement in blood and..."

"No."

There was a moment of silence and the quincy blinked in surprise.

"You are refusing me?" he asked angrily, "You think you dare?"

"I know better than to put my faith in a monster like you," Byakuya said, coughing out his last few words, "I will accept my death and die proudly. Finish me if you wish or let nature have its way with me. I don't care."

He was surprised he could somewhat feel how hard the quincy slapped his face in response. Byakuya's head spun and he began to lose awareness.

"You forget your current position," Adelmo reminded his senseless captive, "You are almost dead, but you are not dead yet. You can't feel pain because you are nearly beyond it, but I can find ways to hurt you as you die. Would you like to see how?"

He smirked wickedly and leaned over Byakuya, touching his palms to the noble's bloody chest.

"My mind has found the way inside you," Adelmo's voice echoed in Byakuya's head, "It is easy to bring everything inside. And once I do, you really will begin to die. But...you will die according to my direction, at the place and time, and under the circumstances of my choosing, Kuchiki Byakuya. But sleep for a while. You need to be unconscious for what I am about to do."

Something in the quincy's fading words made Byakuya want to scream in defiance, but he was drawn down into a pinpoint, somewhere in the depths of his soul and fell deeply into the all-encompassing blackness.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Byakuya?"

The noble's eyes flew open and he immediately wondered how, when he had been at death's doorway, he could have emerged unscathed. And the blood that soaked his clothing warned that he should be in more than just the residual pain he felt. He tried to go back to figure out what had happened when he had collided with his enemy in that last, fatal strike, but his memory seemed oddly clouded and nothing returned to him.

"Hey, I healed you what little I could. You didn't seem too badly hurt. I guess that blood was from that dead quincy over there, huh?"

Byakuya blinked and stared up into the handsome golden brown eyes of the one he had most been thinking about for so long.

"Ichigo?"

The Shiba heir smiled down at him warmly.

"That's better," he sighed, "I was worried you were really hurt. But you seem okay. Do you feel all right?"

"J-just sore," Byakuya managed, bracing himself against Ichigo's shoulder as he sat up and looked around.

"Have you been out cold ever since you killed that guy?" Ichigo asked.

"I d-don't know. Everything is rather fuzzy. But shouldn't we get out of here? This is still a battle zone. There could be enemies nearby."

Ichigo smiled and shook his head.

"We cleared this area. We're safe if you need to rest before going back."

"No," Byakuya answered, accepting Ichigo's support as he found his way to his feet and looked around again to get his bearings, "I want to go back. I need to see if Rukia..."

"Rukia, Renji and Tetsuya are fine," Ichigo assured him, "We were all just out here searching for you. We were worried about you when you didn't come back."

Byakuya felt a soft inward jolt as he suddenly remembered.

_"My name is Amsel Adelmo."_

"What is it? Are you okay?" Ichigo asked worriedly, "You looked kinda unsteady there for a moment."

"You said that you cleared the area," Byakuya remembered, "Then, you killed the quincy that was here?"

"You killed him yourself," Ichigo said, pointing at the dead quincy.

"No, not that one," Byakuya said, frowning.

"There was another one?" Ichigo asked, "What did he look like?"

Byakuya paused, straining to remember.

"I'm not sure. I only heard his voice."

"Well," Ichigo said, good-naturedly, "if he was here, we would have found him. We didn't find anyone in this whole area except for that dead quincy over there, and you."

Byakuya touched a hand to the area just below his navel, trying to sense his reiatsu. He felt a stinging pain and flinched.

"What are you doing?" Ichigo chided him, "You shouldn't be using your powers. You were fighting at full power and probably fried your insides up pretty good putting that guy down."

"But Ichigo..."

"Hey, I know you're not one who likes to accept help from anyone, but let me help you home, okay? Don't try to play it so tough. I think you really hurt yourself inside."

Byakuya felt an instant urge to say something prideful, but when he opened his mouth, what emerged surprised him completely.

"You are right. Thank you, Ichigo."

_What?_

_What happened?_

But, when he stopped to think about it, the words made sense.

_I remember thinking that I had made terrible mistakes with Ichigo. I have always treated him with some amount of disdain. I thought that it was too late. I thought I was dying!_

_Was I only delirious?_

_Was that quincy even here, or was it just my mind warning me to change my behavior?_

"We should really go now, if you're okay," Ichigo suggested, "Everyone's waiting for you to come back."

"Oh...of course," Byakuya said, shaking away his muddled thoughts.

A lovely twinge went through his belly as Ichigo's arm remained around him and the Shiba heir helped him along the trail that led back into the Seireitei.

"I sensed that you were successful in destroying the quincy king," Byakuya said appreciatively, "You weren't injured?"

"I was kinda hurt, but Orihime healed me," Ichigo assured him.

"And the first thing you did after was to come after me?" Byakuya asked.

"Of course. You're my friend and you were missing."

"What about your other friends?"

"They're okay. And the taichous and fukutaichous are beat up, but okay also. There's just a lot of injured people and a bunch of mess to clean up."

"I see."

"And no, I'm not going back to the living world, so don't even go there!" Ichigo laughed.

"Ah yes, I had heard that you are actually the son of that annoying..._Shiba Isshin_."

"That's right. He used to work with you."

"If you can call it that," Byakuya said, frowning, "He did, after all, abandon his post and disappear."

"Well, he had a good reason."

Byakuya studied Ichigo's serious expression and nodded.

"I suppose."

The two continued walking, with Ichigo providing support to the stumbling noble.

"It's weird," Ichigo admitted, "Before, it was like you said. I was a human and I didn't belong in Soul Society."

"Ichigo," Byakuya said, blushing slightly, "I was...wrong to say things like that."

"Look," Ichigo said, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, "You don't need to apologize. I'm saying that you were right before. I didn't really belong here. Even though my father was a Shiba, I was raised a human in the human world."

"That doesn't change who you are, Ichigo."

"I know," Ichigo agreed, "But I couldn't really belong here until I learned what was being kept from me. And now that I have, it's just a little weird to think that, not only am I here to stay and _can't_ go back because of the level of my power, I also have a connection to my family and friends here that means a lot to me."

"And you consider me one of your friends?" Byakuya asked, "Why? I have never encouraged that."

"Bullshit!" Ichigo laughed, "You encouraged it all of the time, once we'd had our fight. You sent Rukia and Renji to me in Hueco Mundo."

"That was..."

"You also came to Hueco Mundo, yourself..."

"For Rukia."

"Yeah, but you helped me with Yammy, and you encouraged me to go back. You knew that I should go back to face Aizen and you believed I would win against him, even though it didn't seem like I could...even if I didn't know I could."

"You give me far too much credit," Byakuya said solemnly.

"I don't think so," Ichigo said, shaking his head, "But play it tough if you want to. I know what's going on."

"What's going on?" Byakuya repeated, giving him a confused look.

"We're really becoming friends now," Ichigo said, giving him a melting smile, "You know I'm here to stay and you can't send me home anymore. I guess you'll have to just put up with me."

"Hmmm," Byakuya mused, "so it seems."

They continued on more quietly as Ichigo sensed the noble's weariness and, without pointing it out, simply provided more support until they reached the gates at Kuchiki Manor.

"You'll be okay now?" Ichigo asked.

Byakuya nodded briefly.

"I will be fine."

He watched as Ichigo started to turn away.

"But I would be better if you could stay."

Byakuya's insides clenched.

_What did I just say to him?_

_I asked him to stay?_

_That sounds so weak!_

Ichigo moved closer and looked into his eyes for a moment, then felt his forehead.

"Are you sure you're all right? That quincy must have hit you pretty hard for you to invite me in. I mean, you can't order me back to the living world, but you can tell me to go home now to Shiba Manor," the Shiba heir laughed.

"Are you making fun of me?" Byakuya inquired, frowning.

"Yeah, a little," Ichigo confessed, "I was just surprised, you know?"

"You probably want to be home with your family."

"I'll stay."

"What?"

"I said I'll stay," Ichigo repeated, "I'll probably get more rest here anyway, and Rukia, Renji, Tetsuya and I can catch up on things."

"Oh," Byakuya said, strangely lost for words, "then I will have a room made up for you."

He felt a heady twinge inside as Ichigo gave him another charming smile.

"Thanks, Byakuya. But let's get you inside and find your clan healer. You look kinda out of it."

"I told you, I am fine," he objected.

"Come on," Ichigo said, wrapping an arm around him again, and despite his usual responses, he made no move to object or to escape the embrace.

_I don't know what is wrong with me._

_What happened out there?_

_Did that quincy actually exist?_

_And if so, did he...do something to me?_


	2. When Things are Quiet

**Chapter 2: When Things are Quiet**

**(Thanks a million to everyone reading, fave-ing, following and reviewing! My gratitude to Winterheart2000 (Hmmm, guess we'll see about that, huh.), Willow (So glad you are along for the read!), Aizenfan6969 (All righty then, here you go!), Anon (Not to worry, here's an update!), Kamelcake (Psst...and make a profile! You should be on here writing with us!), Beaker (Here you go!), Parnita (I guess we'll have to see as things develop, but I have shivers too. These kind of stories give me nightmares!), MinDarksoul (I'm so glad you're in for the adventure!) AsorenRM (Yeah, I kind of regretted that after the fact. I should have just left it with them not yet reaching the manor, I guess.), Shima-taicho31 (Yeah, the Ichi/Bya is always fun to write. :) The scary stuff is harder because I have too active an imagination. That's why I do more romance/drama than scary stories. Still, it's good to spread my wings a little and try different things.), Ctofi1 (So glad you like it!), and Sachiko Heiwajima (Byakuya isn't sure if what he sensed was real, so he will question that. The answer is forthcoming. *shivers*) Enjoy the new chapter!)**

The sweet sound of chirping birds and soft scents of flowers and grass crept into the corners of Byakuya's sleeping mind, bringing him back into awareness. He opened his eyes as his attendant entered the room.

"Good morning, Byakuya-sama."

"Good morning, Torio," the noble answered, feeling a deep sense of relief at the return of something so familiar, "I hope you slept well."

"I did for the first time since the war began," his attendant answered happily, "Despite the damage to the manor, to be able to move back in is a comfort. Not that I don't appreciate the safety that the shelter offered us during the conflict, but..."

"It is good to be home and together again," Byakuya finished.

Torio's gentle smile warmed sweetly.

"Yes...yes it is."

Byakuya glanced at the clock and frowned.

"It's late," he said, climbing out of bed, "I should..."

He paused as dizziness swept through his head and he swayed. He heard Torio's garbled voice, the became suddenly very aware of a dark, enraged feeling somewhere in his core. For one odd moment, he felt an insane urge to hurt the young man in front of him. But in the next instant, the feeling faded and Torio's voice began to leak in.

"Byakuya-sama! Byakuya-sama, I'll go and get the healer."

"N-no, Torio," Byakuya answered, shaking his head and instantly regretting it as the dizziness returned, "I need to check in with my division."

"But Byakuya-sama!" Torio objected, "You're not well, sir! P-please lie down and let me..."

"Who is the master of this house?" Byakuya snapped angrily, surprising himself with the strength of his response.

"Y-you are, of course, Byakuya-sama, but..."

"Obey me at once!"

Torio gave him a dumbfounded look and paled.

"Hey," said Ichigo's voice from the bedroom doorway, "Is someone getting all high and mighty in here?"

"Ichigo," Byakuya said, his body calming at the sight of the Shiba heir, "My apologies. I was so weary that I forgot that you had stayed overnight. I trust you've eaten?"

"Yeah, Renji and I were up with Tetsuya, checking the guard posts at dawn and training. Then, we had breakfast and Renji went off to the sixth to check in. He'll be back in a little while to give you a report, so you can do what your attendant told you and get back in bed. You should rest. The healer was in during the night and said that your spirit centers are healing, but you'll be without your powers for a few days while they rest."

"Hmm," Byakuya mused, his frown deepening, "It seems I will be useless to the Gotei anyway if my powers are not working. I suppose you are right. But I'll get no sleep. I've slept as much as I can."

"Tetsuya told me that you're usually up before dawn," Ichigo chuckled.

"Would you perhaps like to take a walk in the gardens?" Byakuya asked.

Ichigo paused, looking uncomfortable for a moment.

"Oh...I would, but...I have something I've gotta do."

"Ah, I see. Another time then," Byakuya replied, turning his head slightly away as a soft throb of disappointment and embarrassment passed through his insides.

"But, you're going too, aren't you?" Ichigo inquired, making Byakuya stare questioningly, "To the meeting of the Noble's General Council?"

"Oh," Byakuya said, remembering, "I was given a reprieve from attending. Tetsuya is to attend in my stead."

"Yeah, I wish someone could go for me," Ichigo complained, "Just a day out of the war and already those guys are going to start talks about us getting married and making babies. Heck, we haven't even cleaned up the mess and buried our dead. They are really pretty awful sometimes."

"Yes," Byakuya agreed softly, turning towards his bed and sitting down.

Ichigo paused, observing him quietly as Torio stood nearby, wearing a somewhat confused expression.

"Hey, uh...I thought you were going to walk in the gardens," the Shiba heir reminded him.

"Perhaps not," the Kuchiki leader sighed, looking down at his hands, "I think I am more weary than I had supposed."

_Weary? _Ichigo thought, _I think he looks kinda depressed. Damn, did I hurt his feelings when I refused to stay? But that doesn't sound like Byakuya. Hell, asking me to go walking in the gardens is not like him either. Usually, he tries to get me to leave sooner. And he asked me to stay here last night._

Ichigo stole a closer look at the troubled noble.

_What's going on with him? He's acting pretty strange. I wonder..._

He rolled his eyes as a hell butterfly approached and hovered in front of him.

"Aw man, I am _not _looking forward to this!" Ichigo sighed resignedly.

"Could I offer you something to look forward to after?" Byakuya asked, bringing surprised looks to both their faces and Torio's.

"Uh...um..." Ichigo mumbled awkwardly.

"Renji and Tetsuya are going to be working on their wedding plans this evening. I don't know if they informed you, but to avoid Tetsuya being caught up in the arranged marriages and forced to marry a stranger, he and Renji want to move up their wedding date so that it won't be an issue. They were going to marry anyway, but were delayed in starting on their plans because of the war. They'll be making the more general plans today. Rukia and I will be assisting them. You are good friends with them and Tetsuya said that Renji wants to include you in the wedding, so..."

"Ah, right, the wedding," Ichigo said, blushing and smiling sheepishly.

_Shit, for a second, I thought he was hitting on me. This is really embarrassing. I wonder if I should apologize...but that would just make things worse, I think._

"Yeah, sure. I'll come after the meeting is over," Ichigo offered.

He paused and his smile widened.

"Maybe all of us can go walking in the gardens later," he offered.

"Perhaps," Byakuya said quietly, still not meeting Ichigo's eyes, "I will see you later, then."

"Sure. Bye, Byakuya."

"Goodbye, Ichigo."

Byakuya watched as Ichigo left, then laid down in his bed again and looked up at his waiting attendant.

"Will you serve my breakfast to me here?" he requested, "And please do send for the clan healer. I am feeling feverish and dizzy."

"Yes, of course, Byakuya-sama," Torio said, bowing.

He turned and flash stepped away, leaving Byakuya lying on the bed and contemplating the door he had left through.

_I feel off somehow. I keep saying things that I don't plan to. Torio and Ichigo both seemed to notice._

He looked out the garden doors, remembering his interaction with the mysterious quincy.

_I wonder if this strange behavior was caused by him._

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ichigo, would you like a ride to the council hall?"

Ichigo looked up and smiled as Byakuya's sapphire-eyed cousin appeared on the street, alongside him, riding on the back of a tall black Arabian stallion.

"Hey Tetsuya. Hi Arashi," he greeted them, "Sure, thanks, I'll take a ride. I'm running a little late...not that I'm in a hurry to get there or anything. I can't believe these old farts are already going to be going on about getting married and making babies. Like, can we please have a few minutes to breathe a sigh of relief that the war is over?"

"I understand your feelings entirely," Tetsuya agreed, "I am glad that Renji and I are going to be married before the arrangements can be made. Part of the reason for our haste is that I overheard a few of the leaders discussing my performance in the war and asking one of the councilors if I would be among the offerings for arrangement. Byakuya-sama wouldn't allow it to happen, but Renji and I didn't want him to have to go against them if it was as simple as just marrying a little sooner."

"That makes sense," Ichigo mused, accepting Tetsuya's hand and climbing up behind him, "Hell, maybe I ought to find someone I like to marry too...not like a lover, but just a friend. I don't like the idea of a bunch of clan leaders arguing over me like a piece of meat and deciding my future."

Tetsuya nodded somberly.

"Byakuya-sama is likely to face pressure to be married as well, although being a leader, he will have more influence over the matching. You are an heir, so the pressure will be on your father to choose on your behalf. But having met Shiba Isshin, I don't think you have to worry about him not taking your feelings into consideration."

"Although he'll be way too focused on getting me a girl with big boobs and a nice ass," Ichigo said dryly, "Sorry, Tetsuya."

"Don't worry about it," Tetsuya chuckled, "As I said, I understand. Arranged marriages are often a task for the ones forced to undertake them."

"I get that a lot of nobles died in the war," Ichigo sighed, "but why does that have to mean I have to give up my future and marry someone I don't really know? I'd consider Rukia. She's at least a friend..."

"But she is not noble by blood, so marrying her to a future leader is questionable. If you were not in line for leadership, they would certainly consider her on the basis of her having achieved bankai. She is also close to Byakuya-sama, which makes her an attractive match for non-heirs in other clans."

"You mean that she's going to get arranged too?" Ichigo asked worriedly, "How's she taking that?"

"Not well," Tetsuya admitted, "She is very involved with our friend, Orihime, and is beside herself at the thought of having to marry someone else."

"Damn," Ichigo said, shaking his head, "She didn't even say anything when I saw her yesterday or this morning. I wasn't exactly paying attention though, I was so focused on what's happening to me. I guess there are a lot of other people with less choices than I have. I may have it bad, but other people have it worse."

"I am sure that we'll think of something," Tetsuya assured him, "Byakuya-sama cannot allow her to marry a human, of course, but he may use his influence to have her excluded from the matching."

"I wish he could use his influence and have me excluded too," Ichigo complained.

The two paused and waved in greeting as Ikkaku and Yumichika passed them on the other side of the street. Ichigo bowed his head slightly, his mind going back to Byakuya's odd behavior. He considered for a moment, then decided it was better to say something while it was in his head.

"Hey, Tetsuya?"

"Hmm?"

"I was wanting to ask. Have you noticed anything off about Byakuya since I brought him back?" he asked, his heart pounding as he said the words, "I might be just imagining things, but he acted kinda strange this morning...and even a little yesterday when we got to Kuchiki Manor."

"Oh? How so?" Tetsuya asked, tilting his head slightly and glancing over his shoulder at the frowning Shiba heir.

"Well, he was unconscious when I found him. And when he woke up, he seemed disoriented. He asked me about a quincy that he says was there."

"They found a quincy dead near him, did they not?" Tetsuya inquired.

"Yeah, yeah, they did. But Byakuya seemed to think another one had been there. I mean, he talked about it, but then when I told him there was only the one, he agreed that we would have found signs of it if one was there."

"Probably," Tetsuya agreed, "but there are some quincies with unusual abilities. Still, Byakuya didn't report that to me. He should have said something when we debriefed after his arrival."

"Well, he was kind of embarrassed, I think. He didn't want to be accused of seeing things...well, _hearing things_, Ichigo clarified, "He said he didn't see it. He only heard this quincy."

"And he worried it might be a hallucination brought on by his injuries probably," the blue-eyed noble surmised, "But I think we should take this seriously. I will go out to the area with Renji tomorrow and look for any clues I can find."

"Look, just please don't tell Byakuya anything, because I don't want him to be pissed at me for butting in, you know?"

"I will be discreet," Tetsuya promised, "but it is important that every lead be examined, as there have been random attacks by some remaining renegade quincies. The military is trying to use quincy allies to identify and capture them, but things are still very chaotic right now."

"I know you have to check it out. I can come with you, if you want," Ichigo offered.

"It's fine," Tetsuya assured him, "I will have Arashi with me, and probably Renji as well. We will get to the bottom of things. If there is an odd quincy to be concerned about, we will capture him."

"And if not, I know you'll be quiet about Byakuya bringing it up."

"Exactly," said Tetsuya.

"Thanks, Tetsuya."

"You are welcome," Tetsuya replied, nodding, "But did you say there were some other things you noticed about Byakuya-sama's behavior?"

"Yeah, actually," Ichigo confessed, "He was acting kind of strange this morning when I went to check in and see how he was doing. When I was walking to his room, I heard him sort of snap at Torio."

Tetsuya frowned.

"That doesn't sound normal at all," he admitted, "Torio has been his attendant for many years. He is very kind to Torio and his brothers, Koji and Akio. They have all served the main household for a long time as attendants."

"And I've seen he doesn't act that way with the staff, even when they make a mistake," Ichigo remembered, "That's why I thought I should mention it."

"Was there anything else?" Tetsuya asked.

"Well, he seemed a little...I don't know. He asked me to go walking in the gardens and sort of deflated when I reminded him I had to go to this meeting."

"Oh...well, you do know that my cousin is secretly fond of you, ne?" Tetsuya offered.

"Uh, fond how? Ichigo queried, " I know he likes me as a friend. Are you saying it might be more than that? Do you think Byakuya might be attracted to me?"

Tetsuya went silent for a moment.

"I don't know if I can answer that question," he said finally, "I know he appreciates your strong-willed nature, although it causes him grief sometimes. And he seemed pleased at the fact you are staying here in Soul Society now."

"But Tetsuya, I'm gonna be married off to some other girl in a month or two. How would that work? I mean..."

Ichigo froze as realization struck him. Tetsuya studied him quietly for a moment, then smiled gently.

"It sounds as though my cousin might not be the only one feeling an attraction," he said kindly.

Ichigo stared down at his hands, his heart pounding.

"W-well...I don't know. I just...I mean, I haven't thought of him that way before. But the way he's acting fits, doesn't it? Him being distracted and kinda depressed, grouching at his attendants?"

"It seems that way," Tetsuya agreed, "But you sound like you need to think about this carefully. Remember, you are expected to marry and generate heirs, as is my cousin. If you are with each other, you still have the obligation to bring heirs. You will have to examine the intricacies of that if you decide that you want to see each other romantically."

"I don't know," Ichigo confessed, his heart still fluttering anxiously, "I don't know what I want right now. This is really sudden...confusing."

"Well, Byakuya-sama hasn't said anything to you yet, so there is no rush to make any hasty decisions," Tetsuya rationalized.

"Except that I might be getting married to someone else," Ichigo moaned, "Tetsuya, what do I do?"

The blue-eyed noble smiled sympathetically and reached back to squeeze his distressed friend's hand.

"You will think calmly about this," he suggested, "and then follow your heart, of course. That is your way, is it not?"

Ichigo found his smile inexplicably returning, despite his worry.

"Yeah," he said more confidently, "Yeah, that's me."


	3. Droplets

**Chapter 3: Droplets**

**(Thanks so much to Guest (Here's the new one!), Kamelcake (No more waiting!), Anon (You've got it, kiddo!), ShariBerry89 (Ichigo is confused, but Byakuya has some insight that will help.), Aizenfan6969 (Okay, read on...but watch out for the little cliffie.), Kittykins (I like mixing creepy and cute!), Picklez80 (I wonder why you have that feeling...), Beaker (So glad you like it!), TehWonderer (Okay, here's more!), Parnita (Prince in a Glass House has been updated and more Ichi/Bya will be on the way! I'll be posting on this again soon as well. :) Enjoy!), Animebooklover14 (You've got it. I will have more updates on this soon!), BleachLover (I am sure Ichigo will be there for him!), Winterheart2000 (Okay, I will keep the story rolling!), Willow (You are a master of understatement! lol), Irritated Bookworm (Better batten down the hatches. This will get stormy...), Shima-taicho31 (Hmmm, I think Tetsuya's not going to have time for jealousy...*creepy music*), shequitachase (I had some readers request some stories where there isn't mpreg, so I'm working around it for now. That doesn't mean, however, that it won't happen in a sequel. I just want to avoid babies (as much as I love them!) and focus just on Byakuya and Ichigo's relationship for this particular story. They will be busy enough without babies right now.) Enjoy the chapter!)**

Byakuya exited his room and stepped out onto the wooden walkway, where he paused to breathe in the mingled scents of wet grass and flowers that hung suspended on the cool breeze. The sun was just warm enough that it took the chill out of the air, making it a morning perfect for walking the garden trails. He followed the pathway, trying to bury himself in the colors and pleasant aromas, but a heavy feeling lingered somewhere inside and he felt an ache of loneliness.

_He didn't return after the meeting._

_But of course he didn't. I saw the way he reacted when I just asked him to walk in the gardens with me. He reacted with surprise and refused in a way that seemed reflexive. He seemed relieved at having a reason to refuse, and he immediately tried to 'make up for' turning me down by suggesting walking later...but with others. Then, he didn't come back at all._

_I suppose I should just accept that Ichigo is not attracted to me. And now that I have caused awkwardness and discomfort between us, he will avoid me. It was foolish to let on how I felt. Now, I have just created more distance. But perhaps it is better to know that, at this point, than to continue pursuing something that is not meant to be._

_It's strange, though._

_I really sensed something powerful between us. But it seems it was just a growing respect and camaraderie during our struggles in the wars against Aizen and the quincies. He was probably content that I should trust and admire him as a friend, but the idea of me seeing him in a romantic light repels him._

_I wish I had never said anything._

_I thought it was painful to feel these amorous impulses and not to say anything, but it is ten times more painful to say something and be rejected. How will I ever speak to him again? We will always both be aware of my desire for him, and it will drive him further and further away._

_Maybe I should just accept it when the elders pressure me to marry. They only haven't because of my injury and illness upon returning from the battlefront. But as soon as possible, they will point out the simple truth that if I had died in the war, there would have been no heir. There would have been unrest as they would have tried to choose from the young candidates and that process is always divisive. That argument makes sense. Maybe I should just go along with it._

But the thought of laying hands on a person he didn't love made the ache inside become a swirl of discomfort. He breathed in slowly and deeply as he left the gardens and walked out into the sakura and plum groves, meandering slowly among the trees and enjoying the soft fall of petals on the breeze. But even that didn't seem to quell his melancholy and he walked out farther to the large waterfall that spilled down into a huge lake at the edge of a quiet meadow.

He only meant to sit down under one of the trees at the top, but for some reason, his feet kept moving, and so slowly it didn't register, his mind faded into a kind of numbness. He moved without thought, without cognizance of the lovely sensations around him. It was better to disappear into himself, it seemed, than to dwell on the pain that love had once again caused him.

He continued walking and slowly lost all awareness.

XXXXXXXXXX

_I probably really disappointed him, _Ichigo thought, guilt tugging at his insides, _but I don't think it's fair to lead him on while I'm not sure what I feel. Byakuya is a beautiful, attractive person. I do feel something for him. I just don't know if that feeling is love. I think it could be, but I just feel scared to do anything, because I don't know if it really is that I am falling in love with him, or if it's just that I like him in a more friend-like way. I've never been in love before._

_Byakuya's been in love and it ended badly. Hisana sickened and died before his eyes. He mourned her for all of this time. Now, finally, his heart is strong enough to love someone again, and that someone seems to be me. It's a beautiful thing to win his heart, but it's also frightening to take the chance of breaking it with my clumsiness. He doesn't deserve anything but love in return. I just don't know if I'm the person who can give him that._

_But, damn it, I'm already causing him pain. And it will only get worse if I don't figure out something._

_I just don't know what to do._

He paused, realizing suddenly that he had reached the gates of Kuchiki Manor. The house guards motioned for him to pass and he entered the courtyard.

"Shiba-sama, welcome," the housekeeper greeted him.

"Hi Matsuko," he answered, smiling at the old woman, "I'm here to meet with Byakuya. He should be expecting me."

"He is," Matsuko replied, "He is out for his morning walk, but he should return shortly. You may wait with Abarai Renji in the gardens."

"Renji is here?" Ichigo mused aloud, "I thought that he and Tetsuya were investigating the area where I found Byakuya."

"It seems that Tetsuya-san's Arashi threw a shoe and injured his hoof, so he had to return to the manor to have it healed. Tetsuya-san was following a reiatsu trail he found and as Renji-san is less adept at reiatsu sensing, he offered to bring Arashi back to have the shoe reset. Tetsuya-san should arrive home soon."

"Right," Ichigo said, wondering at the uneasy twinge he felt inside.

"Come this way, sir."

Ichigo shook his head to clear it and followed the old woman into the gardens, where he found Renji seated at the garden table and drinking tea.

"Hey, nice of you to drop in," the redhead teased him, "That wasn't nice of you to bug out on us yesterday. Taichou was disappointed."

"He was, huh?"

"Yeah, he didn't say much, but he was quiet and he went right to bed after, saying that he was tired and felt sick."

"He's been like that, off and on, ever since he came back," Ichigo noted, "Has he had the clan healer look at him?"

"Yeah, there doesn't seem to be anything he can pinpoint, just fluctuations in his reiatsu and some weird mood swings. Torio said he's still acting odd, going from being really quiet to being short-tempered."

"I don't like the sound of that."

"Well, you know what the problem is," Renji pointed out, "You really should stop fucking around and just tell him whether or not you're interested. This teasing you're doing isn't fair to him."

"I'm teasing him?" Ichigo asked, the guilty feeling returning to his insides, "I don't mean to. I just don't know, Renji. I like Byakuya. I think he's beautiful. But I don't know if I'm ready to start something that will only end up getting busted up when I'm expected to get married and have kids."

"Baka!" the redhead chided him, "You know that some clan leaders marry guys and just have a surrogate carry the heirs. If you love him and you want to be with him, you can do that. The elders will be disapproving, but as long as there are babies with your guys' bloodlines for your clans, they will not try to stop you from being together."

"Damn," Ichigo managed his heart racing painfully at the thought, "I can't think that far ahead, Renji. I've never even been in love. How am I supposed to know right now if that's what this is?"

"Moron," Renji sighed, shaking his head, "You _don't_ know. That's what it's like. You have instincts and you follow them. If you think you love him, then make a goddamned move already. If you do, problem solved."

"And what if I don't?" Ichigo asked uncertainly.

"What if _he_ doesn't?" Renji pointed out, "You think he's not taking a risk too? And he already lost his wife."

"Yeah," Ichigo said, frowning, "You're right. I am being stupid. I just don't know what the hell I'm doing. I must be driving him crazy."

"A little," the redhead chuckled, "He's been pretty moody."

"Well, maybe it will help if I talk to him and just tell him how I feel. I mean, if he knows that I like him and I'm just kinda confused, maybe that will make him less depressed than walking around thinking that I'm not interested at all."

"Good thinking, Ichigo," Renji laughed with an edge of sarcasm, "It's about time."

"Hey..."

The sound of a shrill neigh and pounding hooves stopped their conversation and the two young men turned as a tall black stallion approached them at a fast trot.

"Whoa, Fleabag, don't run us over!" Renji objected.

Ichigo and Renji stared in dismay as the stallion reared and they heard his wispy voice in their minds.

_Tetsuya has been attacked!_

"What the hell?" Renji gasped, going pale.

He darted forward and launched himself onto the horse's back, then extended a hand and pulled Ichigo up behind him. The Shiba heir wrapped his arms tightly around Renji's waist and tightened his legs around Arashi as the stallion reared again and dashed away.

"Damn it! I knew I shouldn't have left him out there alone!" Renji shouted, "I only did because Arashi was hurt and Tetsuya was worried about him. Besides, the area was cleared before and we hadn't sensed anything dangerous. But it's where Taichou was injured too."

"I thought Byakuya killed the quincy that he was fighting."

"Didn't you say that he heard another?" Renji reminded him, "That's the reason that we were out there."

"But Byakuya couldn't even be sure that what he heard was real. He was injured and kinda out of it."

"Well, out of it or not, it looks like there was someone out there, doesn't it?"

"Don't go blaming yourself," Ichigo chided his friend, "Let's just find Tetsuya and take care of him."

They held on tightly as Arashi carried them into the rougher coutryside, just past the border of the Kuchiki estate. He darted through the trees and out into an area of dry long grasses that were dotted with trees and brush.

_Perfect place for an ambush, _Ichigo noted worriedly.

Arashi slowed as he neared a meandering creek that ran through the area.

_He is nearby. He was attacked upstream and his attacker pushed him into the water. He may have assumed that Tetsuya would lose consciousness and drown. If not for my master's water breathing ability, he would have done so. Still, his life signs are weak. He is up ahead._

Renji made a guttural sound of distress as Arashi reached the edge of the creek and they spotted a collapsed and bloodied form on the shore, with his legs and lower body still in the water.

"Tetsuya!" the redhead cried, leaping down from the stallion's back and rushing to his fallen lover.

Ichigo followed at a run, arriving just as Renji turned Tetsuya over.

"Fuck!" the redhead snapped, "Something cut him up really bad, Ichigo! You and I aren't going to be able to fix this. We need to get him back!"

Ichigo looked back at Arashi.

"You take him. Arashi can't run all of the way back quickly, carrying the three of us."

"But Ichigo, whatever did this is still out here!" Renji objected, "This happened because I left him alone. I'm not going to do the same thing to you! Get the fuck on the horse, okay?"

"No, get out of here," Ichigo insisted, helping him to carry the injured noble to the stallion and lift him onto Arashi's back, "I'll follow on foot and I'll use my flash step. Just hurry and get him back. I'll go the Kuchiki Manor and tell Byakuya what's going on."

"Y-yeah," Renji agreed in a shaky voice, "Yeah, okay."

He climbed up and pulled Tetsuya's unconscious body up against him, his hands shaking as he felt the seeping blood leak onto them.

"Go Arashi! Take us to the fourth division!" Renji shouted.

The stallion screamed and launched himself into a gallop as Ichigo engaged his flash step and followed for a time before turning towards the Kuchiki estate. he covered the ground at a brutal speed, leaving him panting hard as reached the manor gates and was cleared to enter.

"Shiba-sama, what is it?" called one of the house guards.

"Tetsuya was attacked," Ichigo panted, "H-he's been badly hurt. Renji took him to the fourth, but we need to tell Byakuya!"

"Come this way, sir," the guard instructed him, "He returned a few minutes ago and he seemed unwell. His attendant was trying to make him comfortable. But he will want the news about Tetsuya-san. Do you know the extent of his injuries?"

"I'm not sure, but he was cut up pretty badly. Whatever attacked him knew what it was doing. And if Tetsuya hadn't gotten into the water, he'd probably be dead already."

"Wait here, Shiba-sama," the guard said as they reached the Kuchiki leader's bedroom.

He stepped inside and was gone for several agonizing moments before Byakuya's white-faced attendant exited the room and came to meet him.

"Ichigo-sama!" Torio cried, "What happened to Tetsuya-san?"

"He was attacked, out where Byakuya was before," Ichigo reported, "But what's with Byakuya? Did the guard tell him about Tetsuya?"

"He didn't have the chance," the attendant reported, "The healer is with Byakuya-sama now, because he was already feeling poorly, and when the guard started to tell him, he collapsed and passed out!"

"Is he all right?" Ichigo asked in a concerned tone.

"I am sure he will be," Torio replied, "but he will be distraught when he learns our cousin was injured. Our healer is going to stay with Byakuya-sama while I go and find out more about Tetsuya-san's condition."

"I'll go with you," Ichigo offered.

Torio bit his lip gently and gave him a conflicted look.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"W-well," the attendant stammered, "Byakuya-sama should regain consciousness soon. I think he would do better if there was someone...a friend, who could be some kind of comfort while he waits for news."

"Oh...right," Ichigo said, feeling a returning shaft of guilt, "I should have thought. Go on ahead and send a hell butterfly as soon as you know anything."

"I will," Torio promised, "And Ichigo-sama, thank you for being a comfort to him. The war seems to have weighed heavily on him. He has not been himself since he returned."

"Yeah, I noticed," Ichigo said, shaking his head, "All right, get going and send news as soon as there is any."

Torio nodded, then disappeared in a scathing flash step. Ichigo stepped into the room and was waved on by the worried house guard to the Kuchiki leader's side.

_Damn, he looks white as a ghost!_

"What's going on with him, Michio?" Ichigo asked the clan healer.

"It seems he suffered a sudden, sharp drop in his reiatsu," Michio explained, "He has been having power disturbances off and on since he returned. I am almost done stabilizing him, so he should wake soon. As soon as I am done, I must go and see if I can help with Tetsuya-san. Byakuya-sama will be very worried about his cousin."

"Yeah," Ichigo agreed, starting to sit down in a chair by the bed, then pausing as something wet touched his skin.

"Oh, let me take that," the house guard said, removing the clothing that had been set over the back of the chair, "It got damp when Byakuya-sama was walking near the lake, most likely."

The guard exited the room and Ichigo sat down and watched quietly as the healer finished the stabilizing infusion, then left for the fourth division. The Shiba heir slipped a hand into Byakuya's, watching silently as he slept.

_I really feel bad for adding stress to his life by being stupid. I'll at least give this a chance and see what happens. Byakuya's a good person, and he's the kind of person I think I could love. So, as soon as we know Tetsuya's going to be okay, I'll talk to him._

His heart quickened as the Kuchiki leader stirred and his eyes opened. They met Ichigo's, and for one brief moment, the Shiba heir felt a chill pass through him. It was gone a moment later as relief flooded his insides at seeing Byakuya awake and sitting up.

"Ichigo?"

"Just relax, okay? Michio said you just had a drop in reiatsu. He gave you an infusion and he'll be back to check on you."

"What happened to Tetsuya?" Byakuya asked in a slightly shaking voice, "I heard something about Tetsuya as I lost consciousness."

The Shiba heir took a steadying breath.

"He was investigating the area where I found you, and he was attacked."

"By whom?"

"We don't know. Whoever or whatever it was, cut him up and shoved him into the creek out there. Arashi sensed the attack and took us to find him. He's at the fourth division. They'll send word as soon as there's news."

"Why did he go back there, Ichigo?" Byakuya asked, looking oddly confused, "I didn't send him."

"No," Ichigo agreed, "but when I told him you sensed something out there, he wanted to check it out."

"Alone?"

"No, he went with Renji and Arashi, but Arashi threw a shoe and because Tetsuya was following a reiatsu trail, Renji brought Arashi back to have the shoe fixed and his hoof healed."

"I see. Thank you for staying and telling me. But it's all right if you want to go. I'm fine now."

"I don't have anywhere to be," the Shiba heir assured him, "and it's not good for you to be alone while you're sick and waiting for word on your cousin."

"I have attendants that can stay with me. You don't need to feel obligated."

He looked down at where Ichigo's hand held his.

"You don't need to feel obligated _in any way_."

"I don't feel obligated," Ichigo said, matter-of-factly, "I'm staying because I want to."

"You don't need to feel sympathy for me, Ichigo," Byakuya said, looking into his eyes, "If you have no interest in me, it's fine. I can accept that. You should just tell me."

"Well," Ichigo said, blushing, "what if I feel attracted to you? What if I like you and I just have never been in love, so I don't know how to be anything but clumsy about it?"

Ichigo could almost see a measure of the weight lift itself away from Byakuya's troubled heart. The Kuchiki heir went quiet for a moment, then yielded a rare and melting smile.

"Then...you should take your time exploring those feelings," he advised the younger man, "A step forward is progress, even if the step you take is small."

Ichigo smiled back at him and slowly leaned closer, feeling as though hell butterflies were fluttering around in his insides. He was inches from meeting Byakuya's soft lips, when a hell butterfly soared into the room and flashed brightly, indicating an urgent message.

_T-taichou,_ said Renji's soft, tear-choked voice, _You need to come to the fourth right away. Tetsuya's in a coma. Th-they're saying they don't think he'll make it._


End file.
